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8 Signs You're a Terrible Guest

Posted Mon, Oct 06, 2008, 4:10 pm PDT
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At one time you felt you were the belle of the ball with party requests pouring in left and right. But suddenly there's nary an invitation in sight. If your mailbox and inbox are only filling up with bills and junk mail, it's time to take this Foxy test:

DO YOU...

  • think a plus-1 is always a plus?  Unless the invitation says "you and a guest," chances are you are the only one invited. So, don't just show up with someone on your arm, even if you're eager to show off your hot new mate.
  • have a case of the loners?  The whole idea of going to a "get-together" is to get together, not sit in the other room watching TV or playing with the cat. If you're just not feeling the party mood or aren't the type of person who can "turn it on," then it might be better to skip gatherings when you're not feeling 'em.
  • go heavy on the sauce?  Nobody likes an out of control, fumbling guest at their party who accidentally knocks down half the buffet table or passes out on the sofa during group conversation. So, as the saying goes, "drink responsibly," especially when you're at someone else's home.
  • inhale everything edible?  While any host loves to see guests enjoying the nibblies, it's not a good look to monopolize the appetizers by devouring the entire plate of passed dumplings or spicy tuna rolls. Remember, there are other hungry guests at the party too.
  • think your bluetooth is part of your ensemble?  The point of a gathering is to socialize and mingle with other guests, not blab on your mobile phone or text on your Blackberry. That's just plain rude.
  • use the word "me" in every sentence?  While you may be the cat's meow, letting everyone else know about it all night can be overbearing. The key is to be comfortable talking about yourself when someone asks, but be sure to pepper the conversation with plenty of questions about other guests. Other topics to avoid overdosing on if you want to be invited back include: your health, your therapist, and oh yeah, your sex life.
  • overhear people asking about a smell?  Are you dousing yourself with an overpowering scent that other guests could be allergic to? Remember, one spritz is almost always enough. But it could be worse...you could be dousing guests with dragon breath or B.O. Good hygiene is crucial. Nothing's worse than trying to get through a sit-down dinner while seated next to someone who reeks.
  • enter empty-handed?  It's always a good idea to bring a little something-something for the host of the soireé. Something simple yet budget-friendly like bath salts, chocolates, a box of stationery, or a candle will do the trick. (Target and CostPlus are two favorite places to pick up affordable and stylish goodies). Bringing a gift is the classy way of saying "thanks for having me over."

 

And try these tips on what never to do on a first date.

Average (1284 Ratings): 4 out of 5 stars

  • 1. Posted by cincyross on Mon, Oct 06, 2008, 6:29 pm PDT

    WOW i am all eight

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  • 2. Posted by chewy on Tue, Oct 07, 2008, 9:29 am PDT

    The last party I went to resulted in me accidently wetting my pants! (Oops) It was definitly embarrasing. I wonder if I will be invited to the next party. I hope so. Aside from my "accident" I was in control of myself & I got along with everybody.

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  • 3. Posted by Nate on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:18 am PDT

    sounds like a lame party. if you can't get loaded on free booze, dominate conversation while insulting other guests opinions, and gorge yourself on the spread before you leave, you won't see me there.

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  • 4. Posted by GP on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:20 am PDT

    First--bladder issues? Second--coming to a party JUST TO EAT and then leaving. Those folks we don't invite back.

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  • 5. Posted by LD on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:20 am PDT

    Good gravy...do we really NEED direction on how to act...grow up people!

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  • 6. Posted by D L on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:35 am PDT

    That is sad to think that people need to be reminded of how to act, but it is very true that some do. I was blown away when I had someone putting out their cigarette in our lawn during a summer party we had.

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  • 7. Posted by InXanadu2 on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:37 am PDT

    At some dinner gatherings, and even some regular parties, the host has planned everything to minute detail and your offering might not fit with the spread. But even in that case, guests can bring something the hosts can have for themselves later. (That's probably the case more often than not.) The other tips are just common sense--one would think!

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  • 8. Posted by terjon1@att.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:37 am PDT

    MAN DOES THIS DISCRIBE MY NEIGHBOR

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  • 9. Posted by vicleon9631@sbcglobal.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:45 am PDT

    If you invite a friend or somebody who you know , do not espect have them to bring something, like food. they there because you apreciated they friendship

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  • 10. Posted by InXanadu2 on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:48 am PDT

    I just want to add that smoking should be at or near the top of that list! (Unless permission has been granted in a designated area. If you allow it anywhere, I'd say you're a bad host.)

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  • 11. Posted by Tia on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 6:59 am PDT

    People smoke, I'm not a smoker but a lot of my friends are. How can you say you're a bad host b/c you allow people to smoke at your party? Especially if it's outside? I would never allow people to smoke in my house and they all have enough respect for me and my house to do it outside. I'm not going to tell people they can't smoke in the backyard for fear of being a "bad host".

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  • 12. Posted by everclear1962@ameritech.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 7:06 am PDT

    LMAO thanks Nate

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  • 13. Posted by Granny Goose on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 7:07 am PDT

    This is for # two. You may think you were otherwise in control and a good guest but if you wet your pants odds are you were not as in control as you think and probably thought you were carrying on good conversations but probably made no sense at all and people were shaking their heads behind your back.

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  • 14. Posted by dondina22@verizon.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 7:26 am PDT

    SMOKING GUEST: As for guest smoking at your party... I place a small little sign (only 4 inches square) that I place in each in the living areas. It has a small drawing of a frog with the caption that says "IF YOU SMOKE, I'LL CROAK!" It works, and with the light humor, it does not offend my smoking guest.

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  • 15. Posted by on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 7:37 am PDT

    People are too stuck up most of the time. If you're gonna have a party, just to "hob-nob it up", you're so fake. Now if you're having a get together with your friends, you already know what to expect.(They ARE your friends right?) and if you don't want "Bobby the pig-out" or "Danny the drink-all" or "Arllie I'm so full of myself", DON'T INVITE THEM! How hard is that? But remember this...consider who some of your friends are, and if you start trying to change parts of them...YOU might be the next part changed. So invite wisely. Otherwise, you might find yourself BY YOURSELF at your very next exlusive party.

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  • 16. Posted by Larry Handley on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 7:49 am PDT

    Agreee with everything you have listed except #8. According to Ms Manners, it is impolite to bring a gift unless the occassion calls for it, like a wedding shower, etc. It can make the host/hostess feel as if they have to reciporcate. It has never been an excepted social behavior and is not now, just a new fade.

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  • 17. Posted by Jeffrey R on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:20 am PDT

    I have another one...DON'T OVERSTAY YOUR WELCOME. Take the hint when your hosts are yawning, cleaning up, or CHANGING INTO PAJAMAS. That's the sign it's time to go!!!

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  • 18. Posted by jazzy on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:37 am PDT

    If you need tips on how to behave or not to over eat maybe you should just say home i mean come on how hard is it really to be a proper lady or gentlemen.

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  • 19. Posted by MICHAEL LOIS P on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:40 am PDT

    well since most people are ilk they need lessons like this and anyways parties are lame

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  • 20. Posted by joe.cff2 on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:53 am PDT

    First of all how much garbage can these two foxy (average at best) authors throw out. They try to write like a hundred articles every week(take your time one good article is better than 50 pieces of s*!$.They are trying to jump on the whole Sexn Cty/ Desperate Houswives tailcoat and are probably not doin g anything but going to lame holiday get togethers. Well thats the web any lame person can write any lame article.

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  • 21. Posted by slow-motion on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:54 am PDT

    Hey, "Chewey", if I'm ever invited to one of your parties, I will definitely bring you a gift--a large bag of "Depends". And if I invite you, I'll let you know now, it's a BYOB party ("Bring Your Own Britches)

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  • 22. Posted by LAFmom on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 8:58 am PDT

    Smoking is at the top of my list for bad behavior. I don't smoke but let a few friends smoke by the open patio doors and a couple male friends thought that was an invitation to smoke cigars. YUCK!!! It took weeks to get rid of the smell.

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  • 23. Posted by lawrence on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 9:01 am PDT

    agree with the comment by handley. in traditional etiquette, the way one would show appreciation for being invited to a "soiree" is to later invite the host to a party given by oneself. gifts are brought for birthdays, bridal showers etc. to drive the point home, in "olden times" it was customary for hosts to have parting gifts for their guests. this relatively new trend is a product of cosmopolitan faddists and marketing firms. (and maybe sitcoms) still, if one is going to a gathering of trendy/pretentious cosmopolitan types, knowing they expect an offering for the invitation...best to avoid offence and bring some wine or dont go.

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  • 24. Posted by Tad E on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 9:20 am PDT

    Is showing up at their invitation not appreciation enough? Do guests have to "tip" the host as well? If so, what savvy host looks forward to a treasure trove of crap from the local discount store or daisies from the supermarket? Social simplicity should take precedence over pseudo social graces.

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  • 25. Posted by kristinathamesatt.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 11:31 am PDT

    Parties are a place to be yourself..for cryin' out loud. Everybody drinks, eats, talks too much...what's new??!! That's what I love about my friends and if you're this uptight, I don't wanna be around you anyways!

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  • 26. Posted by Jose C on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 11:42 am PDT

    I used to be all eight, now I am just about two of those abnormalities

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  • 27. Posted by brenneth@sbcglobal.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 11:49 am PDT

    good advice.

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  • 28. Posted by chris_nyc462 on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 12:02 pm PDT

    i fart alot when the music is loud. then ppl will be like?ugh what the hell is that. and i'll say its probably the tuna

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  • 29. Posted by fisher-mom@att.net on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 12:05 pm PDT

    My husband and I host alot of parties, One for every major holiday, pool parties, and just to get together with friends. I may not be proper, but it works for us. First everyone we invite is always alowed to bring a guest. Second we know our friends well enough, that they know what behavior we expect at our home, and third If someone gets out of hand, we torment them by bringing it up almost everytime we see them, they behave from then on. Last as far as bringing gifts, we never ask for any thing, but true friends will call and offer to bring something. Friends are like any thing else. They need rules, bounderies, limitations and love.

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  • 30. Posted by band56784 on Sat, Oct 11, 2008, 12:44 pm PDT

    What a waste! Who are you writing this article for?... ...5 Year olds?

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