1561. Posted by lady_lovesoutdoors on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 6:28 am PDT

My future daughter-in-law provided a room for kids at the reception which her teen aged nieces and nephews volunteered to man during the dinner hour. The kids were served "kid food" they loved and there were games and activities for them. A wonderful idea even if you have to pay someone to supervise.

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1562. Posted by ynap67 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 6:55 am PDT

please do not bring gifts of money in enevelpes. at my grandaughters wedding someone stole the gift box filled with cash and checks. much better to send gifts ahead. When people are having a good time they forget to watch the gift table. wiser now!

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1563. Posted by Doru L on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 7:16 am PDT

Most of the thigs listed and said here are common sense or should be part of the early age education received in the family. Since most families nowadays do not teach their kids the basics of behavior in society, one will see lots of big or small no-nos at every social gathering, weddings included. About kids... in most cultures and ethnicities weddings are first of all a family socila event, so kida should be included. Where I come from they always include kids in wedding parties and also gifts or money doantions are a must, and are usually double the price of of a plate x the number of persons (adults and kids) in your party. It is considered that the newlyweds should end up with some stratup money after the wedding, so everybody contributes to this. As far as the dress code goes, it's a good thing to have nice and decent clothes but also bring a change of more relaxed and casual clothes for later on in the party, when things are not so official anymore. Ladies make sure you bring an extra pair of shoes that will allow you to dance al night without having to go to a podiatrist or chiropractor the day after the wedding.... The list could go on and on, but most stuff is common sense...

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1564. Posted by julie07828 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 7:22 am PDT

I have children myself but completely understand when a bride and groom have a need to say no children please. Many families have A LOT of children, and with the cost of a wedding it can be just impossible for them to allow all of them to attend. If children are invited that you can't pick and choose who can bring theirs. It has to be everyone is welcome to bring kids or no one can, except of course if they are in the wedding party. I think its inconsiderate when people are insulted when their kids aren't invited. Usually there is a bigger picture to why they aren't, don't take it personally.

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1565. Posted by minners13 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 7:24 am PDT

$23 a plate?!!? um have you checked out prices nowadays? try an average of $60 a plate! at my wedding, everyone left with all my centerpieces and decorations and i didn't tell anyone they could take them. i spent over $2k on flowers and didn't get to enjoy any of them.... if you want to take something home other than a favor, ASK!

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1566. Posted by emcee04062 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 7:39 am PDT

I have an ex sister-in-law who should have read this list before attempting to make herself the center of attention at my bridal shower and wedding. I should have taken the hint as she tried to make herself the center of attention while I was married to her brother as well!

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1567. Posted by varickwt on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 8:03 am PDT

Sorry that "box" as someone called it to collect "cards" with money is TACKY!! Very, very bad taste. Money should be given to the bride or groom directly and if people have sense you send them a check beforehand or after but NOT at the wedding so it won't get lost or worse... stolen. There is nothing worse than people showing off their "giving" practices to make sure everyone knows they gave. This is not the "Godfather" for cripesakes....

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1568. Posted by lor41051 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 8:27 am PDT

YOU ARE RIGHT ,ON IT ALL

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1569. Posted by author49 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 8:34 am PDT

Better then all things don't tie the not just live together. You both will act better if you know the other can walk out at anytime.

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1570. Posted by tinkerbelleyes_napaval on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 8:49 am PDT

I THINK MOST PEOPLE KNOW ALL THIS ALREADY, AND I THINK IT IS JUST A TAD TOOOO TOOO........I WOULDN'T EVEN INVITE SOMEONE WHO WOULD DO THE THINGS YOU MENTIONED ABOVE. IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN SLEEZY FRIENDS THEN YOU HAVE TO EXPECT STUPIDITY FROM THEM. IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN GOOD CHARACTERED, WHOLESOME, WELL BEHAVED FRIENDS, THEN THAT IS WHAT WILL ENSUE, PEOPLE THAT YOU CHOSE AS FRIENDS IS THE ANSWER; THAT CAN LOVE YOU DURING YOUR BIG DAY.....THIS IS REALLY A NO BRAINER

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1571. Posted by tinkerbelleyes_napaval on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 8:50 am PDT

I THINK MOST PEOPLE KNOW ALL THIS ALREADY, AND I THINK IT IS JUST A TAD TOOOO TOOO........I WOULDN'T EVEN INVITE SOMEONE WHO WOULD DO THE THINGS YOU MENTIONED ABOVE. IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN SLEEZY FRIENDS THEN YOU HAVE TO EXPECT STUPIDITY FROM THEM. IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN GOOD CHARACTERED, WHOLESOME, WELL BEHAVED FRIENDS, THEN THAT IS WHAT WILL ENSUE, PEOPLE THAT YOU CHOSE AS FRIENDS IS THE ANSWER; THAT CAN LOVE YOU DURING YOUR BIG DAY.....THIS IS REALLY A NO BRAINER

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1572. Posted by tricka9 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 9:06 am PDT

This was very helpful I'm currently planning my wedding and was trying to figure out what to do with the kids since my groom insists they come I may do activity tables with a couple of babysitters to keep a close eye on them

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1573. Posted by kelly s on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 9:30 am PDT

Who freeking cares what a waste of a read

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1574. Posted by michaelholmie on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 9:42 am PDT

blah no kids? If it was an appropriate wedding which IT SHOULD BE IN THE FIRST PLACE it would matter not. The only reason you should not bring kids is if that your asked not to or it's your friends wedding.

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1575. Posted by mikeyy200969 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 9:58 am PDT

Your kidding Me? Do You really get paid, to write this crap. LOL

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1576. Posted by andblondie1389 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:07 am PDT

I agree with not dancing dirty. I t is so embarrassing to be dancing with someone at a wedding and they get totally vulgar! NO DIRTY DANCES!!!!

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1577. Posted by maryloutuggy on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:17 am PDT

Do not show off your boobs so that when you show your wedding pictures all people can say is, "Oh look at the groom's sister. Her boobs are HUGE! Oh, by the way, the bride looked good. But dang those things are huge." That is all I heard when people looked at my pictures. I was never the center of attention at my own wedding.

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1578. Posted by andy5166 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:26 am PDT

the worst wedding i"ve ever seen;sanford and son,the parent trap,prrobem child.

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1579. Posted by Kaye on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:27 am PDT

I also, have NO problem with children at a wedding, as long as MOMA & DADDY watch them. but, the problems is usually they let them run wild. crawling under tables and such. If the children are capable of behaving at such an event, I think if is acceptable, only and only if the bride and groom want them there. If they are not invited, they need to stay with the sitter.

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1580. Posted by Niels on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:36 am PDT

Be pleasant and respectful. Don`t spend too much money on weddings whether you are the one getting married or are family or a guest. It is not the wedding that is most important, it is the days, month and years that follow, and for those to be happy, try to be pleasant and respectful; it is a good foundation, (and that include family and friends). Help make the world a little better every day!.

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1581. Posted by svryan2003 on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:38 am PDT

Thankyou for the part about bringing strangers! There's a reason invitations are sent... to INVITE CERTAIN PEOPLE! the wedding party may not want to see your random, and in the case of a seated dinner, they may not want to foot the bill either!

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1582. Posted by AUR on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:47 am PDT

Great, -- and common-sense suggestions. Unfortunately, its the post-literate gen x+ folks who must be reminded of common sense in such matters...or, one could just watch the wedding scene in The Godfather II (i think it was) and observe the behaviour of the guests....

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1583. Posted by Marla on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 10:55 am PDT

I have a child and I recently attended a wedding and left her with a babysitter. There were children there and many were unsupervised. One actually cut in front of the new couple when they were making there grand entrance into the reception as husband and wife!!! Yikes. I agree with everyone who said that we should respect the bride and grooms wishes to have an adult only affair. If you don't like it and you can't detach yourself from your children for a grown up occasion...stay home.

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1584. Posted by lalocavaca on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 11:57 am PDT

Amen to it!! Great article. I was fortunate enough that our wedding guests are educated enough for not getting us on crazy during our wedding day, but I have seen other weddings where some guests came with "BF/GF of the month" and had a fight during reception, or some family members gossiping and making fun of the groom and bride, AND still bringing center pieces home before the end of the reception!!! People, this is not about you and your personal problems....this is about the bride and groom!! Whether you like them or not, this is not the time to complain. Enjoy the day, or if you really hate them....DON'T COME to the wedding and be sure to RSVP "NO" in advance. Center piece is supposed to be a decoration during the reception and unless the bride and groom give the permission, please hold your craving to decorate your own dining table! You're not gonna die just because you don't bring the centerpiece home.

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1585. Posted by lalocavaca on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 12:08 pm PDT

About the dress code, as casual as the venue is, please don't show up with your old jeans with holes, wrinkling T shirt, and your worn out flip flops. Respect the bride and groom! If this is a Hawaiian wedding theme on the beach, you can still dress casually with proper hawaiian shirt, khaki pants .... but please, leave the hole, stinky worn out outfit home. You wouldn't want other guests (esp. mother of the groom & bride) staring at you and think ,"Who is that dung and out dude on my son's/daughter's wedding?"

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1586. Posted by lalocavaca on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 12:20 pm PDT

NEVER add your kids' name on the RSVP card unless the bride & groom include them on the guest list. You need to understand that: a. The bride-groom maybe want to have children-free reception....please respect their wishes. b. The cost of the reception is high and perhaps they only have certain budget for the catering for X number of guests. For our reception we spent $65/person for catering and it was not cheap. c. Common sense...wedding reception usually is a grown up's venue. Find a sitter in advance and treat the wedding reception as mom-dad's night out. If you cannot find a sitter.... just stay at home, wish them all happiness and find another time to get together with the bride & groom.

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1587. Posted by icepicklenine on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 1:48 pm PDT

I swear to God, I was at a wedding last weekend and someone wore a ratty used-to-be-white t-shirt that said "Who Farted?" on it. SERIOUSLY?

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1588. Posted by Kat on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 4:30 pm PDT

Wow...some people have NO CLUE. LOL As someone in the industry AND the mother of a bride to be...I have to say this is a great list that could be quadrupled! 1) Children...ONLY IF INVITED SPECIFICALLY. Most weddings are adult in nature and if they have ALCOHOL, most definitely. The expense is only a small issue of such...but yes, most who will bring the rugrats to a wedding are the same ones who, once they enter the premises, don't keep an eye on them and are assuming others are watching your kids. YOUR BRATS are the ones making ME lose my deposit to the hall/venue! **very mad** 2) Eat all the food you wish...but...if self service (we don't call it a BUFFET at a wedding!) DEFINITELY allow for others to have had first or second servings...and do not hoard any one item initially. Just cause you do not like the oysters, chicken, and pasta does not mean you should have a mile high plate of crab! In fact...I encourage people to finish the food because the caterer probably claims that he donates leftovers to a food pantry AND refuses to let the family take it home...but it REALLY goes home with his staff! 3) CHECK BEFORE TAKING ANY PHOTOS, especially DURING the service!!!!!!!! 4) UTILIZE the RSVP cards, people! Catering is usually prepared for xx amount of RSVPs plus 20, depending on the size of the wedding. If 30 people do not RSVP and then show up...we WILL run out of food! For my daughter's wedding....we are hiring a doorman to man the entrance and guest list. If they had not RSVPed or have more guests than were listed on the invitation, then they will not gain entrance. A friends wedding....people "heard through the grapevine" about it and JUST SHOWED UP!!!...argh!

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1589. Posted by jumble_girl on Sun, Jun 28, 2009, 9:18 pm PDT

My friend was at a wedding recently and told me the best man pulled faces in the formal wedding photos. Stuff like poking his tongue out through V fingers. He thought it was hilarious! Methinks the bride did not....

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