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News flash! When it comes to dating and love, it's not necessarily the prettiest girls who get the guys; there's a lot more to it. One of the biggest mistakes women make is overlooking the basics. It doesn't matter how tough your partner is (or appears to be) -- none of the good ones want to hang out with a girl who makes them feel bad. Remember, everyone likes (and needs) to be appreciated. Good grooming aside (that's a given!), the following are Foxy's 10 reasons why you're still single...
- You Don't Allow a Dude to Be a Dude... It doesn't matter if he "likes Oprah" and admits to enjoying an occasional pedicure, a man wants and needs to feel like a man. The minute you start pulling in the reins on things like his weekend basketball game, poker night, or riding his motorcycle, he's likely to build up some resentment. So, don't bag on him when he just wants to lounge on the sofa watching football for a few hours. Just let him be.
- You're Disrespectful... We're all for girl power, but sometimes strong single gals (aka "alpha chicks") don't realize they're unintentionally engaging in a battle of the sexes. Picking on a guy can seem fun or humorous, but even if you're just joking around, constantly dissing him, especially in front of others, is a huge ego blow. Even if you're just trying to get a laugh, too much teasing will back fire.
- You Don't Share Compliments or Praise... You love to hear how fantastic you look. Guess what? Guys love to get compliments, too! Whether you admire the way he plays guitar, treats his mother, or wears his hair, let him know. Always keeping those thoughts to yourself can keep him at a distance. You don't need to smother him with atta-boys, but an occasional comment about what you like goes a long way.
- You Don't Ask for Help... This is one of those little things that can make a big difference in a relationship, and many overlook it. Guys love feeling needed (don't we all?) -- so even if you're the world's most stubborn and self-sufficient type, surely you can find a few things you might want a hand with. You'd be amazed at how much guys appreciate being asked for help. Just look at your daily routine, or your weekend "to do" list and focus on one or two things you could use a little assistance with. Hanging some pictures? Fixing a cabinet? Chances are you can find something. And, he'll be so glad you did!
- You Act Desperate... Now don't let your requests run away with you. There's a difference between letting someone in your life and being needy and clingy. A man wants to see that you've got lots going on. You will spook him if you try to lock up his social schedule seven nights a week or tell him you've changed all your plans just to be with him. All great reasons for him to run for the hills!
- You're Intimidating... Today's women are major multi-taskers who juggle jobs, family, friendships, finances, hobbies, school, and more. All that "Type A" energy can be intimidating to some guys. Whether you're a hardcore career girl and he's a musician... or you come from a wealthier family than he does... or you're one of those uber-intellectual gals who knows everything about everything -- it's important to be aware of his emotions, support him, and be his cheerleader when needed. And do not compare him to others -- that's just not a place any guy likes to be.
- You Talk Too Much... Talking is a great way to get to know one another -- but some women can't resist the urge to monopolize the conversation or attempt to charm guys with long-winded stories. You don't have to tell him your whole life story on date #1, either -- including how your cat, Muffin, died when you were five or how you keep a "dream journal" of your wishes and desires. People don't enjoying hearing tedious rants or rambles -- the key is to get right to the good stuff. And don't be afraid of pauses! A short silence is better than a motor-mouth that doesn't quit.
- You Hate Being Dirty or Messy... There's something irresistible about a girl who can roll with the punches. You can be miss prim and proper during the work week but if you can't ever loosen the strings, it's no fun. Being uptight is a bore. We've never met a guy who said "I wish I could meet a girl who is uptight!" Life's a dirty business and the more you can play in it, the more he'll appreciate you -- whether it's going on a no-shower overnight camping trip or playing co-ed tag football.
- You Lack Confidence... Nothing's sexier than a confident woman, and that can be a lot to live up to. But try paying attention to your body language and eye contact. They are the most obvious signs of how you feel about yourself. A protective hunched stance, crossed arms, looking down, or turning away -- all have the potential to be big turn-offs. So, stay focused on your strengths instead of what you see as your weaknesses, and you'll see great changes.
- You Nag a Lot... Naggers don't get far in the world of love. What you'll create is a very resentful guy. Whether you're constantly harping on him for the small stuff or dishing out a daily dose of "why can't you be more...?" -- the way to a man's heart is definitely not through nagging. Let the little things go because they are LITTLE. And keep your eye on the big things like: is this a good person, do you have fun together and are you treated with respect?
And check out the Worst (& Most Common) Etiquette Mistakes.
For more tips on how to flaunt what you got and live stylishly, check out our website at Foxy&Co, and our new book, Curves Rule And Flat Is Fabulous: Sexy Stylish Looks For Every Figure.
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